Untitled - when my pop is here, he likes to play this game where he calls my grandmother and says 'hang on she's right here' and shoves the phone in my face. it's real fun for me.

when my pop is here, he likes to play this game where he calls my grandmother and says ‘hang on she’s right here’ and shoves the phone in my face. it’s real fun for me.

seeing as my grandmother and i don’t see eye to eye, it’s always a lovely conversation. she’s the type of old lady that when she sees any person in a restaurant or store that is not white, she immediately assumes they are “the help” and will ask them to get her something. that is also the time where i do the walk of shame away from her and mouth i’m sorry to the poor soul who is left with her.so today’s topic was about the boy and my ‘crazy notion’ that he is a suitable match. according to her, he is not. based purely on his job. you’d think he was a drug dealer selling to a preschool the way she talks about him, not someone who owns his own successful business. so like any loving grandmother, she threw money at the problem and called it a day. if i would just ditch the dude and move back to mississippi, i’ll get any house i want and monthly allowance of 10k. AND to sweeten the deal, I’ll be given a membership to the hunt club. so of course being a vegetarian I am all about that. when i brought up the fact that my doctors are in maryland and the job i rarely go to is also here, this gem was sputtered out “You are a lady, you do not need to work. The right man is not going to allow you to work. And we have doctors in Mississippi. Plenty. Good Christan doctors.” I’m just going to let that one soak in a bit………yeah. i had no idea it was 1945. good thing i have a grandmother to remind me and pay me off.

I’ll go live with your grandma for 10k/month!! Hey we can be roomies in our big mansion and I’ll do the hunting…. Maybe we would become lesbian lovers and really kill her lol